Last week, I wrote an article about hookup two persons at the same time. There are some extreme reactions online. People don’t believe a relationship expert would make such suggestion to date two people at the same time. Some of them even think this is a moral issue, because it equals to cheating. Here I would like to address the difference between dating and relationships.
First, let’s see curvy dating. Dating refers to two people who have romantic feelings toward each other, spending time to get to know each other. BBW dating is the first stage of romantic connection and the second stage is relationship. When two people going out for some time and establish a relationship, it begins. This is when you are referred as boyfriend or girlfriend.
When you meet someone you like, you should tell them what you are looking for. A casual relationship or a long-term monogamous relationship. Although it sound not necessary, but it is not always the right pattern that everyone wants monogamous relationship. Too many relationships end because they want different things. Once you and the person you like talked about what you want, it’s time to start dating.
If you date two persons at the same time and you respect both of them, you are not cheating on anyone. First of all, dating shouldn’t last long. When you meet someone you like and start dating, it shouldn’t be long before you make sure if he is really what you want. Before you establish a monogamous relationship, it is okay to get to know some other people in the same time. There is no need to put all your eggs in one basket. It is very natural to date two people or more at the same time until you find someone really nice and commit into a monogamous relationship.
Most people would want to just skip the dating part when they meet someone they really like and jump right into a committed relationship, because it can be awkward in the beginning phase of meeting someone and it could arise anxiety. Everyone wants to know is he still looking for someone else or not. Is there anyone likes him more than I do? It all comes from insecurity. The safer you feel, the less you are likely to worry about his finding someone else. People with high self-esteem might think I am quite a catch, so I would focus on whether this person is the one I want to be with for long-term. I don’t care how much he likes me. While for people with low self-esteem, they tend to care more about the perspective that other people feel toward them. They are worried that if their partner dates more than one people at the same time, they might not be their favorite.
If you are dating someone and thinking about dating two people at the same time, don’t worry or feel insecure. Tell yourself: I would be a great partner, so if this is fate, they will see my merits and they will choose me. If they don’t, I wouldn’t be hurt as well. After all, they only know me from a few dates. How well can they know me?